Sunday, March 07, 2004

Bin Laden sending faxes. Or, to be technical, since he has already been captured, somebody from the administration is sending fake faxes on bin Laden's behalf. Damn, I got such a good fax, and I thought the prices at The Sheikh's Discount Volleyball Camp were too good to be true.


Posted: 8:38 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

John Kerry's official site says "shit" and "fuck". Link goes to the "site search results" for those two words. Kerry's response, "Hey! I'm a bad-ass motherfucker, dog." I don't know. Those two words didn't bother me much, but I was a little surprised to see him refer to Hillary as "one seriously fat-ass cunt".


Posted: 8:32 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Kerry throws a surprise move - a "split scissors" combined with a picture of Jesus. The President's advisors are appealing to the rock-paper-scissors council, on the basis that there is no "split holy scissors" move. They feel that a faith-based "holy scissors" does have certain advantages over a "regular scissors", and may be able to avoid being crushed by a "regular rock", but doesn't count unless both fingers come from the same hand.


Posted: 8:25 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Drew Carey says the judging on "Last Comic Standing" was "crooked and dishonest".


Posted: 8:19 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Daytona Beach march fizzles: The thousand woman topless march comes up 950 women short. Only one of the organizers removed her shirt, and she was promptly arrested and carted off to jail.


Posted: 8:17 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Seeds of Darkness, a Star Wars fan film


Posted: 8:12 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

That makes sense. Hollywood stars drive small energy-efficient cars, while they use the energy required to heat and air condition 20,000 square foot homes.


Posted: 8:10 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Chimp charmer Jane Goodall returns to the wild. She is now an ardent crusader against deforestation.


Posted: 8:02 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Bush Seeks to Bolster Regular-Guy Image. "Notes to self for March (1) photo op in Crawford - get three dollar haircut from Ol' Gus (2) spark Armageddon"


Posted: 7:41 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Sing - A - Long with Louis Farrakhan (He used to be a calypso singer known as The Charmer")


Posted: 6:27 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Online Etch A Sketch, the only thing less fun than offline Etch-a-Sketch


Posted: 6:24 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Nipple Wars


Posted: 6:22 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Time magazine analyzes the mistakes that got Martha Stewart so deep in such a mess.


Posted: 6:21 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

FilmJerk.com's - Early Report for March 7, 2004


Posted: 6:10 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Aristede's downfall attributed to voodoo spirits. Yup, them and AK-47s.


Posted: 5:52 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

The hardest job in show biz? Cue card boy for a porno film.


Posted: 12:51 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

The full text of Tony Blair's speech on the war in Iraq and the ongoing threat of global terrorism.


Posted: 12:47 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

The top movies at the North American box office again headed by Passion. Starsky opened fairly strong, with thirty million, but Passion had another monster ($50 million) weekend, and is already at $212 million for 12 days! (Return of the King was at $222m over the same period, but Passion had an infinitesmally better second weekend.)


Posted: 12:41 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Ashcroft treatment uncertain for now - doctors say 10-20% chance of death. I wish him well physically, but I certainly hope that various activist groups show precisely the same respect for the privacy of his medical records that he has shown for others. If ever there was a case of karma - that would be it. Bill Maher's line: "it is very unusual for teetotalers to contract this condition. Doctors speculate that he picked it up bacterially by wiping his ass with the Bill of Rights"


Posted: 12:31 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Kerry telegraphs the risky "double rock", leaving himself open to a "double paper" shellacking by the Prez.


Posted: 12:16 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Dave Barrys' topic: "Federal deficit: Meet the other white meat"


Posted: 12:11 PM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Have A Random Sight Gag. The creator of Leisure Suit Larry has thousands of funny fotos.


Posted: 10:08 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Grand Ayatollah Ali Sistani: The real face of power in Iraq Whoa! Not just any Ayatollah, but a Grand Ayatollah! He really gets some good parking places. He is to regular Ayatollahs as Grand Moff Tarkin was to regular Moffs.


Posted: 10:06 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Woman to file suit claiming she was caught on tape in dressing room.


Posted: 9:43 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Bartolo Colon had kind of a disappointing first start for the Angels. Final score: Athletics 26, Angels 3


Posted: 9:28 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Telemarketers Pay Consumers To Listen.


Posted: 9:26 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

James Bond 'too tall' to be a spy. "Britons applying to be field agents (at MI5 -domestic intelligence) should be no taller than 5ft 11ins." (Note: Bond worked for MI6 - foreign intelligence.)


Posted: 9:23 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Elizabeth Jagger, 20, and Theodora Richards, 19, the mini-skirted model daughters of Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, were getting lap dances at Chelsea's Privilege strip club on Feb. 25.


Posted: 9:20 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Impressive body-painting at Fantasy Festival in Key West 2003


Posted: 9:18 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Gilligan to start a radio station in his basement. I guess one of the professor's inventions finally paid off.


Posted: 9:09 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Separate Cinema - the history of African-Americans in film.


Posted: 3:57 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Silicon Valley's Premiere Plastic Surgeon - before and after examples.


Posted: 1:30 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Republican National Committee tells TV stations not to run anti-Bush ads because they are illegally funded. . "I am the law". Wow, and I thought Judge Dredd was just science fiction! Here's the text of the letter: "Dear TV Dudes: normallly you would not hear about legal matters like these from a partisan organization. It would be a matter for an official government agency like the FCC, and you have to appeal through the judicial system if you felt the FCC ruling was incorrect. That could drag on for years, and cost you millions in legal expenses. Fortunately, we have been able to streamline the process by buying up all the agencies and judges, so we're passing the savings on to you. Your pals, the GOP"


Posted: 1:28 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Four free short videos from Playboy Plus!


Posted: 1:17 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

Free Summer Altice playmate gallery courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!


Posted: 1:15 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)

The Exorcist in 30 seconds, re-enacted by bunnies.


Posted: 12:53 AM ... Links to this post ...
Post a Comment? (There are currently 0 Comments, seen below.)