Friday, April 02, 2004

Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry doesn't have a Republican-leaning French cousin. President Bush is not pushing legislation that would have other countries pay off the deficit. Pennsylvania Republican Sen. Arlen Specter is not retiring to study Scottish Common Law. (April Fool's Day crap)


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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles rob a casino.


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The Straight Dope studies whether Abraham Lincoln was gay? Where exactly did he put the Lincoln Log?


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Bill Murray says Kathleen Turner is "a great fuck".


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The famous 'Bored Boy' To Appear On Letterman Show.


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Under pressure from Cheney's attorney, publisher cancels reissue of Lynne Cheney's lesbotronic novel.


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URL says it all: BillionairesForBush.com


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Disney fleshes out dates for 2004 line-up


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Marlon Brando, The Godfather of Method, somehow lives to be 80!


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Jon Stewart takes a look at high fuel prices.


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This is the trailer for Two Brothers, a Jean-Jacques Annaud film about two tiger siblings separated as cubs.


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Man in 'Tigger' Costume Charged With Molesting Girl, Mom at Disney World. Hey, they should have known that from the song about Tiggers. "They're loaded with vim and with vigor - they love to leap in your laps."


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Remarks by Former President George H.W. Bush Denouncing So-Called Intellectuals Too Dense to Notice America's Wondrous Progress in Iraq


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Judge declares mistrial in Tyco corruption case


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Textbook piracy runs rampant in developing countries, costing publishers and authors millions of dollars. It is hilarious to visit some parts of the world and look at the books and CDs for sale, by artists like Carlie Sighmen (with a picture of the real Carly). At one point I asked the international parent company's reps if they knew their dealers in Egypt were selling illegal bootlegs. They told me everything was legal. I responded that it is fairly typical in legal CDs to spell the performers' names right! Many were spelled phonetically, the way they pronounce English there - Sinatra's first name was spelled "frenk" for example.


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First trailer for the Natalie Portman dramedy, Garden State.


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Companies add 300,000 Jobs in March, the fastest pace of the millennium.


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First time caller, long time Superman reader: Seinfeld talks sports on a NY radio station.


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Mouseketeer roll call. Count off now!


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A Cambodian man cut off his penis when he said he was visited by four hungry spirits in a dream and he had no chicken or duck to offer them.. He said, "Devils, I don't have any chicken or duck for you. If you want to eat anything, you can eat my penis." That line works a lot better on evil spirits than it worked on my second wife.


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Studios set release dates for Batman Begins, X-Men 3, and Fantastic Four .


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Improve your athletic performance with PowerSox. No wonder I sucked at sports. I had the wrong socks! Imagine if I could take a pair of PowerSox with me into a time machine, and guard Wilt's ass in his 100 point game. He'd be lucky to hit double figures.


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More Arena Football cheerleaders - The Columbus Wardogs. I guess the lady in the front row center must be somebody's mom


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A 'Coach' reunion on 'The District' : The former stars of "Coach" - Craig T. Nelson, Jerry Van Dyke and Bill Fagerbakke - keep cracking up on the set of the CBS drama "The District."


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Here are four free short videos from Playboy's Beach Babes!


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Gillian Bonner was a Playmate of the month in 1996. Here is her free, nude, Playmate gallery, courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!


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The trailer for the new comedy from that master of subtlety, Johnny Knoxville, The Ringer. Desperate for cash to help a friend in need and pay off his smarmy uncle’s gambling debts, Steve Barker sinks to an all time low...he attempts to fix the Special Olympics by pretending to be a person with intellectual disabilities. But he is completely out-classed by his fellow Olympians, who are not only superior athletes, they’re also wiser in the ways of the world. Several of his fellow competitors immediately spot Steve as a fraud, but because they too would like to see the fall of Jimmy, the snooty reigning champion, they join forces to help The Ringer win. Together they train Steve to become a better athlete and, most importantly, a better man.


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