Sunday, June 27, 2004

Halle selects the next man who will cheat on her.


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Former Van Halen frontman David Lee Roth will add the unlikely title of emergency medical technician to his resumè.


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Bruce Willis wants hair!


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The trailer for Pauly Shore is Dead . "Hollywood comedian/actor Pauly Shore loses everything: his house, nobody in Hollywood wants to represent him, he moves back home with his mom and is now parking cars at the Comedy Store. Then one night when he's up in his mom's loft, a dead famous comedian appears who tells Pauly to kill himself cause he'll go down as a comedic genius who died before his time. Pauly then fakes his own death, and the media goes crazy. Celebrities are talking about him on MTV and girls are fighting over him on Jerry Springer. It's everything that he wanted...his plan worked. A week or so later the LAPD is tipped off about his whereabouts and they break down the door of the seedy motel room that he's hiding out in and throw him in LA County's celebrity wing."


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President Clinton's My Life presented as a powerpoint presentation


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The six rules to adapt a comic book into a good movie.


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Hillary Clinton, and some serious pokies. Oh, yeah, did I mention that the pokies belong not to Hillary, but to Natalie Portman.


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Blogger Tim said...

The link wasn't working when I tried it, but this is also posted on thatsjustnotright.com ... with Hillary cropped out, no less.

Just lookin out for the rest of ya ....

 

Fahrenheit 9/11, as reviewed by The Filthy Critic. "So here it is: I think George Bush is a fucking asshole. I also think Michael Moore is a fucking asshole. Bush is the probably the bigger one, but he didn't make a movie."


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FilmJerk.com's Early Report for June 27. 2004


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Now this is what makes soccer a great sport. Sexy Football


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Iowa to Southern Miss: you stole our logo. For reference , here is Iowa's long-standing logo, and here is the new one for Southern Miss


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Blogger Sparks said...

Quote from an Iowa fan board:

"Most intstitutions and businesses have 'PR' departments that try to keep their respective image looking good. We at the U of I pride ourselves on having the only Major D1 school in the country that has a PR department that looks for new and exciting ways to make us look like even bigger pricks than we already are."

 

Will the Great White Way be blacked out this summer.


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The trailer for National Treasure: "The film is a caper story about a secret code in the U.S. Constitution that reveals the whereabouts of a treasure buried during the 1700s. Nic Cage plays an archaeologist-historian on the hunt for the treasure."


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In the entire history of baseball, since 1876, no team has ever been 18 games or more below .500, then climbed back over .500 until yesterday, when the Tampa Bay Devil Rays did it. You have to think Lou Piniella is earning his salary.


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Fahrenheit 9/11 wins the weekend with an uncanny $25,000 per screen. Dodgeball did well, and was still within a stone's throw of first, reaching $67 million in total. Shrek 2 is still going pretty strong, just short of $400 million! Damn, that's a big number. Spidey 2 opens next week and will change the ballgame.


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Shaq says "I'm like toilet paper" Well, he is kinda soft and absorbent, but toilet paper probably makes a higher percentage of free throws.


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Ten amazing scenes for Spidey fans


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New Yorkers addicted to sex. 8% of New Yorkers are sex addicts, an amazing statistic, because the other 92% are heroin addicts and can't get it up.


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Bush's comment on Cheney Obscenity: "Shit Happens. Now watch this drive."


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COTE, the Coalition Of Terrarium Enthusiasts, once seen as a prime Nader supporter in the 2004 race, announced Friday they would instead be endorsing an iguana named 'Lizzie' Nader's campaign advisor said, "He feels betrayed. Those nutbars were the heart and soul of his campaign."


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Borowitz: Vice President Dick Cheney scandalized the United Kingdom today, cussing out Queen Elizabeth II in what observers said was his most profanity-laden tirade to date.


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Green Party Refuses to Back Nader for President. Say Sayonara to Good-Time Ralphie


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Some great, unintentionally funny headlines.


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Michael Moore thinks the Democrats suck almost as deep as Bush. And as for Nader? The portly populist also trashed "good-time Ralphie" because, "he doesn't give a [bleep] about anybody but himself."


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TRANSCRIPT OF "LONG-OVERDUE" EXCHANGE BETWEEN VICE PRESIDENT DICK 'CHRISTIAN VALUES ROLE MODEL' CHENEY AND RAGE-CONSUMED LIBERAL SENATOR PATRICK LEAHY.


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Leading actresses to show some skin in Broadway's Dracula.


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Play Scissor-Paper-Rock with Richard Simmons!


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