Sunday, February 06, 2005

ONE YEAR LATER, FIRST JANET JACKSON JOKES ARRIVE IN IRAQ. Rumsfeld Apologizes for Delay.


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Brady has still never lost a post-season game.


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List of Polish secret agents can be found on internet. I don't see the need. You can just look them up in the Warsaw phone book yellow pages under "Agents, Secret".


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The University of Calgary is about to introduce another controversial computer science course in which students will be taught how write programs that create e-mail spam and spy software. Yeah, we need to have more people who know how to do that. My penis could use another seven or eight feet in length. I'm still a bit behind the blue whale.


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FilmJerk.com's Early Report for February 6, 2005


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Looking for a career change? This could be it.


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XXX: State of the Union - Super Bowl Ad. Ice Cube takes over from Vin Diesel as the designated superspy.


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Batman Begins - Super Bowl ad.


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Constantine - Super Bowl Ad


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Wedding Date, as reviewed by the greatest of all critics, Filthy: "Wedding Date has two saving graces:
  1. it's really fucking short -- I walked in a few minutes late and was walking out 75 minutes later;
  2. and it's not Alone in the Dark.


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Follow-up. Cookie girls won't have to pay fine. I don't know how I feel about that. Since other people bailed them out and they won't have to pay the consequences for their own actions, they may not have learned their lesson. That means they roam the streets, free to do other kind things!


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UC Considers Bar Codes For Cadavers. I love the final sentence of this article. "In 1999, the director of the UC Irvine program was fired after being accused of selling spines to a Phoenix hospital." I wonder how big a market there is for black market spines. Anyway, bar-coding seems like the way to bring it to a halt, unless they can get Bruce Willis to blow away the spine dealers.


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Boogeyman takes the number one spot at the box.
  • Perhaps reflecting a long dry spell with no comparable new movies, The Wedding Date took the #2 spot. despite being on only 1700 screens. It actually took in more per screen than Boogeyman. The experts had predicted it to do much worse.
  • The dreadful Alone in the Dark took in less than a million dollars, despite being on 2124 screens - a paltry $367 per screen for the entire weekend.. Assuming four showings per screen per day, that works out to $30 per showing - four customers!! It dropped an alarming 72% from last week. (Since BOM started tracking this data, the record holder is Gigli with 82%)
  • The middle of the chart is dominated by films with Oscar nominations. most of them with stable screen counts. Hotel Rwanda did pick up 400 more screens, and did fairly well.


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It's official: Dan Marino and Steve Young are in the Hall of Fame.


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Awesome. There will be an NC-17 rated version of Seed of Chucky! Could it be that Team America will NOT get the Oscar for "best puppet fuckin'"?


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The betting odds on The Grammy Awards. You KNOW you're a gambling addict if you bet on the Grammies.


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Woo-hoo! I've been waitin' for this one probably as long as I've been alive. Perhaps longer. The trailer for The Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill. "The true story of a Bohemian and his remarkable relationship with a flock of wild green-and-red parrots."


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The trailer for Uncle Nino. An elderly Italian peasant, Uncle Nino, comes to America for the first time to spend some time with his nephew's family.


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Six clips from Constantine


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