Sunday, February 27, 2005

Swank and Blanchett have a date with Oscar! Neither showed any skin. The only skin among this year's ten femal enominees was Linney's brief flash in Kinsey and Portman's thonged bottom in Closer. But what have the ten nominees shown in the past? The answer is found in the Scoopy.com UNcoverage of Oscar night.
  • Winslet, of course, is a Hall of Famer. Madsen did a lot of nudity in the 80s and early 90s. Bening chipped in with a couple of juicy roles in that same era. Linney waited until she was 40, but now seems to remove her clothing in every film. Staunton, Swank, Portman,and Blanchett have provided only brief glimpses of forbidden flesh. We are not aware of any nudity from Moreno or Okonedo


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Intelligent MIDI Sequencing with Hamster Control. I'm not sure what that means, but it should cure Richard Gere's fear of computers.


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Rock Comes Out Swinging As Oscar Host. This article includes most of his zingers. I have to say that his mean riffs on Tobey Maguire, Colin Farrell and (especially) Jude Law did make me a little uncomfortable. (Although they were pretty funny).


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Scorsese makes it 0 for 5; Million Dollar Baby takes top Oscar prizes.
  • Scorsese did not win the Best Director award. That was expected by the bookies. His film also lost Best Picture. That was a minor surprise. The offshore oddsmakers had called The Aviator a narrow favorite over the actual winner, Million Dollar Baby.
  • The Aviator did win four of the techno-nerd awards, and also garnered a Best Supporting Actress trophy for Blanchett. .
  • No surprise: Jamie Foxx won the Best Actor statuette for Ray.
  • No surprise: Sideways and Eternal Sunshine won the screenplay awards.
  • (I guess I hang with a bad crowd, because everyone I know thinks Eternal Sunshine should have been the best picture winner, and it wasn't even nominated.)


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IMDb's gallery of Oscar photos


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FilmJerk.com's Early Report for February 28, 2005


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Here's the trailer for Sahara, starring Matthew McConaughey, Steve Zahn, and Penelope Cruz. (Damn you, National Treasure, for making money)


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Borowitz: CANSECO CLAIMS HE INJECTED GOLDIE HAWN WITH BOTOX. Wrinkle Elixir "Hollywood's Dirty Secret," Slugger Says


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Fellow comics advise Chris Rock on how to improve the Oscar telecast


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How nerdy are you?


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Stack the Cats


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This is a real children's book: EVERYONE POOPS


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Smirnoff ads - the closest thing to art in the world of commercials


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Some new images from The Legend of Zorro


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Inside Deep Throat, as reviewed by the greatest of all movie critics, Filthy


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Sex is for FAGS! - Boys Abstinence-Only Education Coolness Program


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Boys' Private Parts: 10 Things Every Girl Should Know About Them, by Laura Bush


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