Monday, February 28, 2005

USATODAY rates the WORST Oscar fashion. These people and some others ragged on Hilary Swank, but I though she looked totally hot and reasonably elegant.


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Ah, the joys of moral certainty.Abstinence based programs, if anything, actually induce teens to have more sex. And best of all - the kids have the sex without having learned about birth control!


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I don't know what the hell "miracle tan" is, but I like their ad campaign! (This is not actually an ad, but a staged topless photo of Pam Anderson taken by the legendary David Lachappelle.) How many boob jobs has Pam had now? Some up in size, some down. I've lost count. I'll say this for her - she's in great shape to begin with, and modern science has done the rest admirably.


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Gosh, Mr Wizard, what happens if you put a light bulb in a microwave? Well, now you know, Tommy. Unfortunately, you'll never be able to have children, so you won't be able to pass the knowledge on.


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Base London's new ad campaign - unmodel behaviour. (Nudity, sex, perversion - now THAT'S advertising!)


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The year 2005 marks the tenth anniversary of some true internet pioneers: Yahoo, Netscape, e-Bay, Amazon, and (most important of all) Uncle Scoopy's Fun House


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A 63-year-old Wisconsin man is charged with sexual gratification with an animal for allegedly having sex with calves after his local bar closed.
  • Quick, call "Pink" Freud, Animal Psychiatrist. This is a major issue. Their tender psyches might be crushed, and a cow which is molested in childhood might not be as delicious!
  • I'm curious about the name of the crime: "sexual gratification with an animal." Is it still a crime if the cow doesn't climax?


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Cows have a complex mental life in which they bear grudges, nurture friendships and become excited by intellectual challenges.
  • And don't even get me started on pigs. The one on Green Acres was always demanding to have his M&Ms separated.
  • "Christine Nicol, professor of animal welfare at Britain's Bristol University, said even chickens might have to be treated as individuals with needs and problems."
  • I see a Fox series in the making - "She's the hippest doc on the animal block. This is not her grandfather's psychologist. She's Punk, She's Pink. She's Sigmunda 'Pink' Freud, Pig Shrink"


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Natalie Portman's Oscar dress - some see-through action. Keep your eyes open for better pics, as will we.


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Photo: Natalie Portman's Oscar dress. (Some see-through action)


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Ah, the greatest aspect of Oscar Night - the bitchy, catty fashion reviews.


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VILLAGERS in Fiji are planning a legal challenge against Hollywood star Mel Gibson because he is buying an island which "was stolen from their ancestors in the 19th Century."


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I just happened to find this entertaining and useful site by following a link back from our logs: The Not Safe For Work News . If you like Other Crap, this takes it up a notch to Holy Crap.


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Academy Awards TV audience down slightly overall. Chris Rock did bring in a new audience. The telecast was watched by more young people and more urban dwellers than last year, and viewership in the top 56 markets actually increased, but viewership in the heartland sunk.


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Will Zach Braff be the new Fletch? Kevin Smith seemed to indicate that on his message board Sunday, which is where the link goes. (Kevin's post is about a third of the way down. Look for the word "Fletch")


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Cranky carowner? Oh, man, that was the wrong place to park.


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The Case Against Michael Jackson: The Openings - February 28, 2005 "The Smoking Gun reports live from opening statements in the Jackson trial. Updates here every 10 minutes--whether you want them or not!"


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Paris Hilton to become big real estate wheeler-dealer, just as soon as she can pay Nicole the rent for a hotel on Baltic Avenue.


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Christina Ricci tells the Daily Show about her role as a soul-crusher on the set of her movies.


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The Daily Show's Lewis Black talks about right wing ideologues with gay relatives.


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Star "kisses celebrity posterior so tirelessly that it's a wonder her life isn't sponsored by Chapstick."


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The Daily Show looks at Black History Month and bowel discomfort.


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Transcript: Chris Rock's riff on President Bush at the Oscars


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The distinguished and prolific actor Ronald J. Hyatt will address the august Oxford Union debating society. (Mr. Hyatt is more commonly known as porn star Ron "The Hedgehog" Jeremy.)


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Saddam Hussein will be forced to sit in a Hannibal Lecter-style cage during his trial. "“Saddam will be housed in an underground cell and will travel to and from the courtroom cage using an elevator."


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Drew Barrymore has now become a totally different person.


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Here's Tim Robbins responding to Chris Rock. Chris said "here's the man who has thrilled us with his acting and bored the pants off of us with his politics .... "


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The Dutch wrestle with the consequences of liberalism. Many try to leave.


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USATODAY.com's pictorial slideshow of the 77th Annual Academy Awards, including the red carpet, and the winners' gallery.


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Weekly World News: How to tell when a politician is lying.


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Ever the diplomat, President Bush hands Pooty-Poot his ass in public.


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Halle Berry is not only gorgeous - she has a sense of humor about Catwoman! "I want to thank Warner Brothers for casting me in this piece of shit," says Halle Berry to the Razzie crowd. Chris Rock had a funny intro for Halle on Sunday, calling her an Academy Award winner and the star of the highly anticipated Catwoman 2.


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Strange Concepts: Blink O Rama - a blog all about people blinking


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Strange concepts: The Big Hebowski. (He-Man cartoon with The Big Lebowski's dialogue.)


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