Friday, March 18, 2005

The trailer for GODARD'S MASCULINE FEMININE, a restored 1966 picture being re-released on the mini-micro-arthouse circuit (one screen at a time).


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Lil' Kim Won't Get Maximum Sentence, Expert Predicts. As Baretta would say, "Don't do da rap if ya can't take da rap." And dats da name o' dat tune.


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Curly, Larry, Moe--and Jacko. Some people say he was The Fourth Stooge. On the other hand, some people say James Taylor was too good for Carly Simon.


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Lil' Kim Won't Get Maximum Sentence, Expert Predicts. As Baretta would say, "Don't do da rap if ya can't take da rap." And dats da name o' dat tune.


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Curly, Larry, Moe--and Jacko. Some people say he was The Fourth Stooge. On the other hand, some people say James Taylor was too good for Carly Simon.


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NBC Pairs Jesus, Pill-Popping Priest in TV Pilot. I get it. And he's a South American priest named Jesus, so the show is called "Jesus and Jesus". Kidding aside, this is a real quote from an NBC executive: "If we do it right, with quality, I think there's millions and millions of people who would say, 'Hey, that's what I've been looking for on television.'" I can't attest to the "millions and millions," but it is certainly the catalyst I need to get me back to the tube. And who could argue with the casting of Garrett Dillahunt as Jesus? (Well, I was thinking Gilbert Gottfried.)


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Oregon State Player Allegedly Caught With Stolen Sheep. I need to tell you that the following are not jokes or comments. They are the facts of the case:
  • Although the 200 pound animal was in his vehicle when he was pulled over, he claims that he had nothing to do with the theft. The sheep was planted on him! (Any criminal can plant a murder weapon on you, but planting a sheep takes a truly diabolical mastermind!)
  • The sheep was actually a ram which was part of a study on homosexuality in sheep. I guess I can see why he would deny stealing a gay sheep.


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Is brainwashing possible? How does it work?


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The Daily Show does its traditional "Bono: Week in Review"


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The Daily Show makes a serious examination of the IRA from a St. Patrick's Day party.


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Claim: Disposable chopsticks are loaded with carcinogens. [[[]]] Status: False. But I'll tell ya what - those suckers ain't helpin' the environment any.


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A clip from Deuce Bigelow - European Gigolo. Oh, hell. I have to admit it. I laughed out loud at this. They're going to drum me out of the Tarkovsky Society. I just know it.


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filmcritic.com's 50 Most Quotable Movie Lines of All Time


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13th seeded Vermont defeats mighty Big East champ Syracuse.


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Iceland may offer Bobby Fischer citizenship, sanctuary.


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Couple Sells Candles That Smell Like Jesus. Luckily for marketers, the Bible is very specific about the essence d'God. They have sold tens of thousands of these at eighteen dollars a pop!


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President Bush has a scalp-rubbing fetish


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Russian woman gives birth to Cyclops (Hey, Pravda translates as "truth", so it must be so.)


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Anonymous Simey said...

Not really sure what the fuss is about here. They give the impression that this poor baby is something unique, but Cyclopia is a well known condition; you'll see similar pictures in a decent paediatrics textbook. The cause is similar to that which gives rise to a cleft palate. As the foetus develops from a 'tubelike' form to the human form, it needs to subdivide to create the two symmetrical halves of the body (i.e. left arm / right arm). Occasionally, this process doesn't complete properly, and the palate isn't complete, or in the case of cyclopia, the two sides of the face don't divide in to two. If you look closely in the textbooks, the one 'cyclops' eye is actually two fused very closely together. Grisly but gripping.

 

Here is the trailer for War Of The Worlds


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Texas Lawmaker Wants End to 'Sexy Cheerleading'.


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Conan O'Brien interviews Vin Diesel's brother, Leonard.


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Reuters writes an article about Parker Posey joining the Superman cast, but pictures Parker, Mary-Louise


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Weekly World News: "HOW TO STEAL YOUR BEST FRIEND'S GIRLFRIEND"


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The trailer for Red Eye: " From director Wes Craven (the 'Scream' franchise) comes 'Red-Eye,' a suspense thriller at 30,000 feet."


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Here's the trailer for the summer's Michael Bay spectacular - The Island, a sci-fi epic with an eclectic A-list cast.


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Karen Hughes, Newly Appointed Undersecretary of Arabiac Reeducation, Unveils New Campaign to Boost Non-Hatred of America By Lunacy-Prone Muslamoids - WHITEHOUSE.ORG


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Monty Python's Spamalot' Gives Broadway a Silly Season


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Danger, Will Robinson ... A tribute to robots in stage, film, and TV.


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(Quote from /.) --- "A few guys have gotten together to create a downloadable 'television show' about The Scene--the underground network of suppliers, rippers, and coders who bring pirated releases to the warez crowd."


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The Saudi Arabian security forces have arrested 110 men at a 'gay wedding' party in Jeddah. Homosexuality is illegal in Saudi Arabia and is punished by flogging, jail or even death.
  • Even if it were legal, do you know how hard it is to moisturize in the desert?


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Orlando Senator Hopes To Ban Visible Underwear. He is proposing a 10-day jail sentence for violations. Y'know, I do get riled when foreigners talk about how dumb Americans are. But every so often, you have to see their point. This guy got elected. Thousands of people voted for him.


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Mr Spock has a new book out - photographs of fat chicks naked!


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Wisconsin Milwaukee knocks out 'Bama and UAB upsets LSU. Our Longhorns lost in a 8-9 matchup.


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