Wednesday, March 23, 2005

MrTwig's SouthPark site has the new episode available. The boys become talent agents.


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East Texas house stolen brick by brick.
  • "When Smith County Constable Dennis Taylor got a call reporting a stolen house, his first question was, 'Is it a trailer house, ma'am?'
  • 'No, it's a brick house,' the real estate company representative replied."


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Borowitz: "IN BEARISH SIGN, GREENSPAN RUNS OUT ON CHECK AT SIZZLER. Analysts See Fed Chief's Move Signaling Troubled Economy


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Superstar CELINE DION has hit out at audiences at her Las Vegas shows - insisting they are not 'real fans' and often fall asleep while she sings. Damn, she wasn't supposed to reveal that. If you have Sominex stock, sell short.


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“Britney hates being overweight and is keen to shed the pounds she has put on since getting wed.”


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"An overwhelming 82 percent of the public believes the Congress and President should stay out of the Schiavo matter." Wow! I guess these guys kinda miscalculated their spin.


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps they're acting on principal and not acting merely on poll numbers. They should be applauded.

 

"Playing simple computer games at the office could improve productivity and job satisfaction." Not to mention high scores.


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Jon Stewart interviews Craig Ferguson.


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CNN's Rick Sanchez proves he's a man who's not afraid to get 50,000 volts for a soft news story.


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The Daily Show's Rob Corddry reports on the controversy of government produced news.


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The Daily Show: As the White House teaches, if you want something spun right, you've got to spin it yourself.


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Lewis Black takes comfort in seeing Congress take on such pressing issues as steroid use in baseball.


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Clemens's stolen orange Hummer found. You do have to admire the sheer cojones of any crook who thought he could get away with stealing a full-sized one-of-a-kind Longhorn orange Hummer belonging to to most famous guy in town. I wonder how they planned to slip away unnoticed. This could turn into another one of those "dumb crooks" movies. Get Michael Rapaport on the line.


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When your pet dies - turn him/her into a pillow!!


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An era passing ... GM Says It May Kill Off One of Its Brands. Buick and Pontiac are the obvious choices.


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"INGLORIOUS BASTARDS to be broken up into two volumes KILL BILL style?"


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“We don’t want your gay business districts, same-sex marriage, body pierced, tattooed to the ankles, (c)rap music, lowrider, celebrating diversity-while-standing-for-nothing liberal nonsense here in Idaho."


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The teaser, trailer, and six clips from a new Brit comedy, It's All Gone Pete Tong


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Proof positive that Barry Bonds did not take steroids.


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Former Playmate and Santa arrested for stealing power tools. Those fuckin' reindeer games are getting a lot kinkier.


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Maxim plays an April Fool's photo prank on the Bush twins.


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Letterman's "Top Ten Signs You've Hired A Bad Easter Bunny"
  • 9. Reeks of tequila and Easter egg dye.
  • 5. Only gives the kids candy after they attend his presentation on the time-share condos.


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Nostalgia: 80's Movie Trailers


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Study shows that monkeys can do deductive reasoning, are thus ineligible for U.S. Senate.


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Playwright Edward Albee and actors Kathleen Turner and Bill Irwin are involved in a new staging of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" I have good memories of Edward Albee. When I was still in high school I published an article about "Virginia Woolf" in The Rochester Times-Union. It kinda sucked, I suppose. After all, what does a 16 or 17 year old know about modern drama? But my mom was impressed with it, as moms will be, and sent it to Albee without my knowledge. The cool part of the story is that he was kind enough to respond to me with a hand-written letter! I still have it, envelope and all, and that was 39 years ago. (It has a five cent stamp!) So I guess ol' Ed is a pretty cool guy.


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Louis Black weighs in on the institutional betrayal of public trust.


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Sean 'P Diddy' Combs is planning to make an Ocean's 11-style heist movie - but with an all-black cast. I'm still waiting for the all-black version of The Last Polka.


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Nicole Kidman hopes to get a degree in philosophy.


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"Soup Nazi" plans to franchise his store.


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Two men left a trail of coins from a convenience store they burglarized to their home.


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CARDSHARK Online - The World's First Card-Cheating Web Site


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C-list celebrities hope peace rally will re-invigorate careers.
  • "Glover and Garofalo were joined by thousands of other ex-celebrities across the globe passionately fighting for their own recognition, including Ethan Hawke, Harry Belafonte and Mike Farrell, better known as B.J. Hunnicutt of TV’s M.A.S.H. "


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iowahawk: How to Blog Good


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If you just can't get enough octopus porn, this site's home page is gonna make your day.


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The NY Post says PAT O'Brien, the host of 'The Insider' who entered rehab on Sunday, has more to worry about than sexually explicit voice-mail messages.


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Anti-piracy office accused of piracy.


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Latino Review has some new images and a summary of Everything is Illuminated, which stars Frodo, and was written and directed by actor Liev Schreiber.


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Oh, thank God. There will be a Santa Clause 3.


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Borowitz: SHAQ TO TESTIFY ABOUT DOUGHNUT ABUSE IN NBA. Krispy Kreme Calls Government Hearings "A Witch-Hunt"


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Baretta says he has an empty wallet. Not to mention an empty revolver.


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Today in Uncle Scoopy's Guest House: the Alfie remake. Some nice nudity from Sienna Miller, and some brief, rare flashes from Jane Krakowski


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