Wednesday, May 04, 2005

The Greatest Game Ever Played
  • : "From the studio that brought you 'The Rookie' and 'Miracle' and director Bill Paxton, comes a story of courage, passion and of the greatest American sports hero you have probably never heard of... An amateur player from a working class family, Francis Ouimet - played by Shia LaBeouf ('Holes') - shocked the golf world when at the 1913 U.S. Open, flanked by his 10-year-old caddie, he defeated his idol, the defending British champion Harry Vardon - played by Stephen Dillane. An unlikely match-up - 'the ingenue versus the seasoned champ' - theirs was the greatest match the sport had ever known. Caught between a world of hardship and a beckoning life of privilege, Francis needed to prove his unfailing will and ability to make it to the tournament. Elias Koteas ('Traffic,' 'Ararat') plays Francis' tough, hardworking father. Newcomer Peyton List is Sarah Wallis, the beautiful young woman, who catches Francis' heart. Joshua Flitter is Eddie Lowery, the pint sized caddie who helps Francis find his way through the troublesome fairways to victory."


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The Bible Poop Quiz. " ... take the following quiz to find out just a few of the things God has to say about feces in the Good Book"


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BBC says "The new Star Wars film is a 'bloodbath' which deserves its PG-13 rating" Wait - does this mean it might not suck? I'm outraged!


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Buffy lands two solid film roles. When questioned by the body collector, Gellar replied, "I'm not quite dead yet."


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Virginia Mason Hospital is off the hook over a patient set on fire during surgery
  • The quote of the day comes from a hospital official, who must be the best spin "doctor" ever. He said "The incident had nothing to do with the patient's death that day" {cough}


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Come As You Are - Banned TV ad


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The Simpsons live in ... Matt Groening's Portland, Oregon?


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Why waste your hard-earned money on money-grubbing quacks when you can do it yourself with the Home Vasectomy Kit


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Nike iD Billboard Invites Mobile Users. "It lets people use their phones to design or even to buy a personalized shoe on the Reuters sign in Times Square."


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Bigfoot photographed in Idaho. Bigfoot, real name Donatello "Big" Foote, did not return calls for comments.


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Borowitz: ABC's new poll shows Paula Abdul is Evil Incarnate.
  • "According to the survey results, Ms. Abdul’s popularity has plummeted following the ABC broadcast, with her meager approval rating of 4% well below that of terrorist madman Osama bin Laden (7%), North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Il (9%), and Beelzebub (13%)."


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An Italian website that published a photo montage of Pope Benny Hex dressed in a Nazi uniform was told to suspend its activities on Wednesday for offending the Roman Catholic religion - an offense punishable under Italian law by a year in jail. Shit - remind me never to visit Italy again. I just calculated that I would have to spend the next three millennia in an Italian jail.


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Star Wars and Napoleon Dynamite - together at last! AtomFilms presents Anakin Dynamite


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The Daily Show: "Filtering technology on DVD players allows you to filter sex and violence, but sadly, not suckiness" (WEBMASTER'S NOTE: For reasons not clear to me, The Daily Show pulled this content. It did include some very risque material about the First Lady, but I'm not sure that was the cause. I have a feeling Jon will explain this sooner or later.)


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Buffo - The World's Strongest Clown! If you live in Pennsylvania, Buffo could be the best entertainment value in your area. Well, excluding cow-tipping and ridiculing the Amish. I guess you really can't have more fun than making fun of the Amish on the internet. Costs nothing, and the best part - they'll never know!


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Blogger Buh'Weet said...

I've actually seen him at a fair, and he did a kids party up the street. Believe it or not he's pretty entertaining if you're under 5

 

Cool Hunting: Toilet Bowl Restaurant - with pictures.
  • "It's a restaurant in Taiwan with a modern decor and a full-on toilet theme. The thorough implementation includes toilet chairs, urinal sconces, and even commode shaped serving pieces."


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Conclave Obscurum - I have no idea what this site is about, but it sure has some cool flash animation.


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What's Your Bag? - simulate the late 60s


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Advance word on the Carlito's Way prequel is excellent.


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Actor Macaulay Culkin and two other witnesses whom prosecutors say were molested by Michael Jackson will be among the first to testify in the pop star's defense


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URL pretty much says it all: MartinShortIsLame.com (Well, not QUITE all. Maybe you should know that the webmaster of this site is the noted Canadian Oddball, Tom Green)


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"Family Guy" now in the Top 25 - Top 10 among the 18-49 audience.


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I know it's hard to believe that the picture is siller than this headline, but have a look: "Plastic potty helps pussy pee"


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Anonymous Sparks said...

"[The inventor] says as well as eliminating the need for kitty litter in the house, it means the cat can stay indoors, which protects native wildlife."

Yep, heaven forbid a predator actually kill some prey. That might wreck the ecosystem. It's much more natural to have a cat use a friggin' commode than kill a mouse....

 

Two Laramie, Wyoming men are facing obscenity charges for allegedly building a snow sculpture of a phallus in their front yard. "Oh, you mean you said you wanted an Ice Palace?"


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Weekly World News: "GAY PRIDE GROUP IN BID FOR NATIONAL GAY DAY!" ... "IF APPROVED: ANY MAN CAN BE QUEEN FOR A DAY"


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The trailer from 3 Extremes, a horror anthology film from three differrent Asian directors.


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Here's the trailer from Crazy like a Fox. Official press release:
  • "Crazy like a Fox" is the story of Nat Banks, a gentleman farmer who loses his family seat to a pair of real estate operators from Washington, D.C. But when the time comes for Nat to leave his ancestral home and move to a rental house in town, the pride of possession from so many generations on the same soil makes it impossible for him to go. He moves into a cave by the creek that runs through the back of his former property instead. Nat won't go down without a fight! He spends the summer there in a kind of Robinson Crusoe splendor in the wilds of Virginia, until the cold rains of November make the folly of his situation overwhelming. But when new owners leave Greenwood empty to spend the winter in Palm Springs, Nat and his family just move back in, to reclaim their family home until the spring thaw brings about a final confrontation between the dubious forces of progress and the old guard of Virginia.


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Here's the trailer from the acclaimed and timeless screen classic, Supercross The Movie. I thought Ed Wood Jr was dead, but this sure looks like his work.


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Five new clips from Will Ferrell's Kicking & Screaming
  • No plot summary needed. Just go to the IMDb summary for Little Giants. Any time it says "football," cross that out and write "soccer." Anytime it says "brother," cross that out and write "father." Leave everything else the same.


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Here's a completely new Yahoo-exclusive trailer for The Devil's Rejects (Rob Zombie's sequel)


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Here's the teaser trailer from The Legend of Zorro


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Today in Uncle Scoopy's Guest House - Elizabeth McGovern in Ragtime. The DVD includes a deleted scene with more McGovern nudity. For some reason it is digitally blurrer and desaturated, but the ol' pause button works miracles sometimes when the blurring is sloppy.


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The Daily Show's Stephen Colbert to get his own show. I'm not surprised. He is one funny dude.


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New York Daily News presents jokes cut from Laura Bush's monologue.
  • "Yesterday I thought the milk tasted funny. I gave it to Dick Cheney to try, but he spat it out. I forgot he only drinks blood."


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Star Magazine claims: "Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie made so much noise during an animalistic sex session that security rushed to their room." What's the big deal? I have had this happen to me several times. Sadly, I was alone in the room.


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Cool! Cassini spacecraft crosses Saturn precisely on the ring plane


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Judge Dismisses $9M Lawsuit Against Maher


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Oprah calls in dog shrink for her pooch


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