Monday, September 26, 2005

Now here's a movie that needs to get made: Brian Dennehy as Skipper, Adam Sandler as Gilligan, Rob Schneider as ????


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Claudia Schiffer as Ginger, Katie Holmes as Marry Ann, Ann-Margret as Lovie Howell, Don Adams as Thurston Howell-oops too late.

 

Could this be the most unnecessary movie every made? The trailer for Yours, Mine and Ours.
  • Cheaper by the Dozen and a Half? Will this come out in competition with Cheaper by the Dozen 2?
  • I can't believe Dennis Quaid let himself get talked into this. He is either behind in his payments, or temporarily forgot he was Dennis and took one of Randy's scripts. (Rene Russo looks gorgeous, however!)


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Super Mario Brothers - the Opera. Joining the greats of opera: there's Don Giovanni, Madame Butterfly, Springer, and this.


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Even when not throwing each other out windows, the Czechs are some weird dudes.
  • "The idea is disarmingly simple. Two bronze sculptures pee into their oddly-shaped enclosure. While they are peeing, the two figures move realistically. An electric mechanism driven by a couple of microproccesors swivels the upper part of the body, while the penis goes up and down. The stream of water writes quotes from famous Prague residents. Visitors can interupt them by sending SMS message from mobile phone to a number, displayed next to the sculptures. The living statue then writes the text of the message, before carrying on as before."
  • With videos and animation. Must-see. Totally fucked up idea.


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The trailer for Ushpizin
  • "A heartwarming and humorous Israeli drama set in the customarily closed world of ultra-Orthodox Jews, "Ushpizin" is the story of Moshe and Malli, a married couple, who are suffering through a financial crisis. Naturally they pray for help, but instead of a miracle, two suspicious strangers with criminal pasts appear on their doorstep. The couple believes their guests were sent to them by God as a test of faith. The film is reportedly the first made by members of the Israeli ultra-Orthodox community."
  • Another certain blockbuster!


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The trailer for SueƱo
  • "John Leguizamo, Elizabeth Pena and Ana Claudia Talancon star in this inspirational film about Antonio, a young man who gets the once in a lifetime chance to make his dreams of becoming a musician a reality. Antonio moves from Mexico to Los Angeles to pursue his dreams of sharing his music with the world. Just as he is about to give up after toiling at his uncle's fast food joint, his dreams become within reach when the 'Chance of a Lifetime Mystery Musician Contest' comes to town. Along the way to making his dreams a reality, Antonio meets up with two beautiful women who also rediscover their passions."


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Two clips fromThe Greatest Game Ever Played
  • You enter from the "course map."
  • "From the studio that brought you "The Rookie" and "Miracle" and director Bill Paxton, comes a story of courage, passion and of the greatest American sports hero you have probably never heard of... An amateur player from a working class family, Francis Ouimet - played by Shia LaBeouf ("Holes") - shocked the golf world when at the 1913 U.S. Open, flanked by his 10-year-old caddie, he defeated his idol, the defending British champion Harry Vardon - played by Stephen Dillane. An unlikely match-up - "the ingenue versus the seasoned champ" - theirs was the greatest match the sport had ever known. Caught between a world of hardship and a beckoning life of privilege, Francis needed to prove his unfailing will and ability to make it to the tournament. Elias Koteas ("Traffic," "Ararat") plays Francis' tough, hardworking father. Newcomer Peyton List is Sarah Wallis, the beautiful young woman, who catches Francis' heart. Joshua Flitter is Eddie Lowery, the pint sized caddie who helps Francis find his way through the troublesome fairways to victory."
  • This is one of the best sports books ever written, about possibly the greatest real-life underdog story of all time, so my hopes are high, but I'm terrified that Disney will turn it into something sappy. (That music scares me!)



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The trailer for Glory Road.
  • "Glory Road tells the inspiring true story of the underdog Texas Western basketball team, with history's first all African American starting lineup of players, who took the country by storm, surprisingly winning the 1966 NCAA tournament title. Josh Lucas stars as Hall of Famer Don Haskins, the passionately dedicated college basketball coach that changed the history of basketball with his team's victory in this time of innocence."


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A moment of silence under the cone ... Actor Don Adams dead at 113 years old. Would you believe 82? He almost made it as an A-list star. Missed it by THIS much.


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The Danish government is under attack for paying for its disabled citizens to have sex with prostitutes.


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What is the all-time best Sitcom Theme Song? There is a tournament to determine this at Boston.com. Well, excuse me, Boston.com, but I'm having a tough time lending any credibility to a tournament in which Green Acres wasn't even nominated.


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Retrocrush got it right. It's obviously Sanford and Son.

http://www.retrocrush.com/tvthemes/1-25.html

 


Blogger Uncle Scoopy said...

I don't think it was eligible.

Retrocrush was picking all TV Themes, while boston.com is picking TV theme SONGS, with words and vocals, this eliminating Hawaii 5-0 and many other greats.

Actually, Retrocrush's choices were too parochial, even given their definition of any music for any type of show. Of all the great TV westerns, Bonanza probably had the worst theme song, and the great shows from the 50s - Westerns, Adventures, and Cartoons would probably be about 20 of the top 25.

Just judging from popularity, Danger Man ("Secret Agent Man"), Rawhide, Rockford Files, Davy Crockett, Hawaii 5-0 and Have Gun Will Travel all made the Top 40 at one time or another, and I think Cheyenne and Yancy Derringer were the two best of the bunch.

If memory serves me, the theme from Route 66 was also a Top 40 seller. Were there others as well?

Having said all that, I also have to admit that Retrocrush's choice for Gilligan/Brady is a proper one in the respect that just about every American can sing those songs. If you are going to do a sing-along, those are the two songs everyone can do.

My choice, however, combining popularity, memorability, and quality, would be "Secret Agent Man", the theme from Danger Man, a song which is still played today by every garage band under the sun, and which Retrocrush picked 96th.

If I'm just picking the one I like best personally, it's this one, which Retrocrush did not mention:


Cheyenne, Cheyenne.
Where will you be camping tonight?
Lonely man, Cheyenne.
Will your heart stay free and light?

Dream Cheyenne
Of a girl you may never love
Move along, Cheyenne
Like the restless clouds up above.

The wind that blows, that comes and goes, has been your only home.
But will the wild wind one day cease, and you'll no longer roam.

Move along, Cheyenne
Next pasture's always so green.
Driftin' on, Cheyenne
Don't forget the things you have seen,

And when you settle down
Where will it be, Cheyenne?

 

Crazy site for the fans of the hit ABC show "Lost." Tons of stuff here if you have the time and desire to dig for it.


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2005 NFL Cheerleading Tour - Day 13 :Denver Broncos

Tonight we head out West for the Monday Night Football match up in Denver. This is Kansas City's first Monday Night trip to Denver since the classic October 17, 1994 game in which Joe Montana engineered a late 4th quarter drive on John Elway's home field. This should be a great contest. The official web site for the KC Chiefs claims that 25 of the last 30 games between these two teams have been won by the team that scores last.

I figure we should take a good look at the girls now because, according to weather.com, cooler weather my cause the girls to cover up a bit by halftime. Well, it is fall in Colorado. The Denver Broncos cheerleaders have the hearts of fans all over the Rocky Mountains. Their web site has some highlights, but there should be more. There is a nice gallery of the 2005 auditions (although it takes a little while to download), and a great video of the 2004 auditions. The bios are very nice, and the picture accompanying each one is great, but there should be more than one picture accompanying each bio. It looks like the roster picture was taken when the team was announced after final try-outs. That is OK, but it would be nice to see the team in their uniforms, which are some of the best in the NFL). There is a nice preview of the 2006 swimsuit calendar, but you get charged for screen savers! That's crazy! The appearance section is nice (you can see which girls will show at events), but no pictures of the events themselves. The section states that the girls do over 1,000 hours of community service. We should see it! All in all not a bad site, but there is still room to grow in the Mile High city.

Rating 7.0 out of 10.


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The REAL Pat Tillman
  • Remember the name? He was the "handsome, muscle-bound NFL star who passed up a multi-million dollar contract to become an Army Ranger battling Al Qaeda in Afghanistan."
  • He was held up as a gung-ho warrior by the right and a mindless dupe by the left. As so often happens, they were both completely in error.
    • Tillman joined the Army specifically to fight Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, but was sent to participate in the invasion of Iraq against his wishes. He called the invasion, "so fucking illegal."
    • He was an avid reader and fan of Noam Chomsky. Tillman's friend arranged a meeting for him with Chomsky that would have taken place if Tillman had ever returned from Afghanistan.
    • Tillman was an independent-minded, outspoken Bush critic who planned to vote for John Kerry.


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think much more highly of him now. See, you can be patriotic and think the war is completely idiotic. Imagine that.

 

Say what? "Women who are left-handed may be at a higher risk of developing breast cancer." Well, at least you can't accuse these researchers of wasting millions to reach on obvious conclusion.


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EEEEWWWW! DAVID CRONENBERG'S PUBLIC SEX
  • "Eccentric film-maker DAVID CRONENBERG shocked his cast and crew on the set of new movie A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE, by publicly performing sex scenes with his wife. The director hoped his explicit displays of affection with his wife would help stars VIGGO MORTENSEN and MARIA BELLO, who play man and wife in the film, feel more comfortable during their sex scenes together. But, instead, the Cronenbergs just left everyone on the set stunned."



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Some semi-see-thru t-shirts as worn by Xtina.


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Sports Dignity is dedicated to nudity at sporting events. Most of it is male, but there are some hot chicks in there if you look around.


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Guy Ritchie forgot Madonna's full name live on television Yeah, as if he ever knew it.


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The Houston Chronicle asks, "How come fuel trucks couldn't make it to Houston, but Tom DeLay and Sheila Jackson Lee had no problem getting here? The wrong bags of gas got through."


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Nicole Kidman will star in and produce a big screen adaptation of Jules Bass' comic novel Headhunters, about four New Jersey women who jet to Monte Carlo and pretend to be rich heiresses in hopes of landing wealthy husbands. There, they are targeted by four down-on-their-luck gigolos trying to pass as wealthy playboys.


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

OH MY GOD!!! Can I get advance tickets now? I will make a mint scalping them, I'll bet.

 

The Corpse Bride, as reviewed by the man who truly puts the mise in mise en scene, whatever that means, The Filthy Critic
  • "There should be a warning label on The Corpse Bride. I mean, if they're gonna warn middle-aged men that sucking too much beer can be hazardous to their unborn babies' health, the government should step in and let folks know that this movie has a shitload of show tunes in it."
  • "Another warning maybe should be about the unbearable puns. The goth movie is littered with macabre puns about 'losing heads' and 'cutting someone short' like it's broken glass under the sand at Bolsa Chica State Beach. It seems to me that puns are the sort of thing that nobody enjoys, but a lot of people assume everyone else does. They have the same aura as John Grisham novels: they appear clever without ever being so."


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This was posted inside an earlier thread, but it needs to be up here on the main page. "A few links and a Yahoo search later, we have possibly the ultimate tin-foil hat site. Turns out Katrina was manipulated by the Illuminati to distract the press from the revelation that Bush bribed his way into the presidency." Was Hurricane Katrina Contrived Via Weather Modification? Yeah, that hurricane really helped the Bush cause. Why, after his response, I'm surprised he didn't get added instantly to Mt Rushmore!


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