Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Ex-NBA bad boy Rodman signs with IBL
  • "The Rent-A-Rodman campaign will make a stop in Iowa next year. Dennis Rodman, the former NBA star who has appeared in several leagues since leaving the NBA five years ago, has signed a two-game contract with the Cedar Valley Jaguars of the International Basketball League, IBL officials said Tuesday."



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Madonna: 'I'm a different person now'
  • Unfortunately, neither one of them can act.


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Next stop: Nixonville. "Mr. Bush maintains daily contact with only four people
  • ... first lady Laura Bush, his mother Barbara Bush, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Undersecretary of State Karen Hughes. The sources also say that Mr. Bush has stopped talking with his father, except on family occasions."


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"March of the Penguins" on Oscar documentary list.


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Digital Piracy or Fair Use? The iPOD Media Studio


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"Your mom" -as defined by the Uncyclopedia


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Conan O'Brien's quotables for the week.
  • "Apparently, Paris Hilton was rammed from behind, then, later, she had a car accident."
  • Ashlee Simpson said she did not want to marry someone who can sing. "Ashlee said, in other words, 'I'm looking for someone like me.'"
  • "In a new interview, Geraldo Rivera said that in person Michael Jackson is much more normal. Fortunately, Jackson only seems normal when he's standing next to Geraldo Rivera."




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The Daily Show's This Week in God looks at the Arabic-language version of The Simpsons


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The trailer for the documentary, Zizek!
  • "The author of works on subjects as wide-ranging as Alfred Hitchcock, 9/11, opera, Christianity, Lenin and David Lynch, Slovenian philosopher Slavoj Zizek is one of the most important and outrageous cultural theorists working today. This captivating, erudite documentary explores the eccentric personality and esoteric work of this incomparable academic and writer who has been called everything from 'the Elvis of cultural theory' to 'a one person culture mulcher'."


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Four clips from Marebito, a horror film from the director of The Grudge


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Three clips and the trailer from Terry Gilliam's Tideland (Click on "access map")


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HILLARY CLINTON NAMED ENEMY COMBATANT ... Transferred to Guantanamo Under Provision of Patriot Act


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Halle Berry is the new face of Versace


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The Weekend Warrior makes his predictions for this coming weekend.
  • He's calling Harry Potter at $100 million. That's fair enough, since the first three all opened at at least $88 million
  • He figures there will still be enough people left to open Walk the Line at $20 million
  • He thinks Chicken Little will only lose 40%, despite a heads-on attack on its audience from Harry Potter


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This week's movies (eleven gazillion screens): Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - 83% positive reviews.
  • They better hurry up with the last three films, because the kid who plays Potter already has a receding hairline! In three years he's going to look like George Costanza.


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This week's movies (2900 screens): Walk the Line - 82% positive reviews. This Johnny Cash movie must be a lot more interesting than its previews, which are typical edgeless biopic bullshit.


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This week's screen counts. Walk the Line 2900, Shopgirl expands to 600, Good Night and Good Luck expands to 850, Harry Potter will be on three gazillion screens. (Or at least 3800)


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Letterman's "Top Ten Signs Your Neighbor Has A Pet Lion"
  • "His kids' science fair projects always involve gnawed gazelle skeletons"


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MAN POSES AS CPR DUMMY FOR WOMEN'S TRAINING CLASS (Gee, guess which newspaper featured this story.)


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King Cross State Police
  • (This appears to be another sneaky LOST clue of some kind. Look at the page's source code for even more obscure stuff.)


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50 Cent will again turn his reality into fiction with a new line of hip-hop novellas and graphic novels featuring his former G-Unit rap crew buddies. Let's see. There's Dumb Donald and that fat guy and ...


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Weekend Update for October 29th (Lance Armstrong show)
  • Tina's best line: "A new study finds that men who smoke are less likely to make a woman pregnant than non-smokers. Especially if they smoke pole."


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New Jersey is seeking a new state slogan
  • "Entering New Jersey. Who farted?"
  • "We got no slogan. You got a problem wit' dat?"
  • "Slogan dis!" (Grabs crotch.)
  • "Hey, look, not every state can have the Big Fuckin' Sky."
  • "New Jersey. Some parts are pretty safe."


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Senator Proposes Pink Tags For DUI Offenders


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Urban Legends Reference Pages: looks at the myths about ICE info.


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A look at the controversial best-seller Are Men Necessary?


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SI.com looks at the Dolphin and Redskin Cheerleaders


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Man convicted of trying to extort Sheffield and his wife


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The Daily Show: "The rush to war was merely incompetence; the administration's not evil, they're Urkel."


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Now that's nuts! ... RUGBY fan Geoffrey Huish told yesterday of the moment of madness when he hacked off his own testicles because his team Wales beat England.


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The most searched-for terms on the 'net 1995-2005. We've just lived through the Pam Anderson decade.


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The Worst Record Covers of All Time


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Bush: Job Ratings (Handy reference with results of multiple polls.) All of the November polls show him in the 35-38 range. The range was 37-42 in October, 40-45 in September. Using the midpoint as his indicator, he is dropping exactly three points per month. (42.5/39.5/36.5)


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First instance of Bird Flu in USA


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The Straight Dope: In medicine, what's the difference between an -ectomy, an -ostomy, and an -otomy?


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Six minutes from I Walk The Line


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Sarah Silverman talks to NPR about 'Jesus Is Magic'


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KIM JONG-IL'S APPROVAL RATING REMAINS AT 100% ... North Korean Madman Gloating About Latest Poll Results
  • According to the poll, Kim scored particularly well on issues of trust, with 100% agreeing with the statement, “Everything Kim Jong-Il says is true and everything everyone else says is a lie.”


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Meet the man who could save the internet.


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