Friday, December 16, 2005

Kevin Costner's Hairdresser Nicked His Computer
  • This is shocking! Somebody admitted to being Kevin Costner's hairdresser.
  • In other news, I'm Bill Shatner's voice coach. Tape at 11.


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VIDEO: Homer Simpson - Portrait of an Ass grabber ... with Dennis Franz as Homer


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Here is the film clip of the firefighter who caught the baby thrown from a burning building


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Some preview footage from APOCALYPTO (Directed by Mel Gibson)


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Conan_O'Brien looks far, far into the future with Jack Black


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The trailer for 'Catch and Release', a romantic comedy starring Jennifer Garner and ... Silent Bob??


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Like the FBI, we have our "most wanted" list. Here's our hardened criminal of the day: The sentencing of a Wellington woman who smuggled a hamster into New Zealand has been adjourned after she failed to appear in court.
  • In case you were wondering, and how could you not, the hamster's name is Eric.
  • The maximum fine for hamster smuggling is five years in jail and/or $100,000.
  • In a related story, insert your own joke here about Richard Gere being in New Zealand for Peter Jackson's next movie.


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Classic Weekly World News headlines


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What else will Yahoo buy?


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Janet Jackson has had a massive weight gain since the wardrobe malfunction.


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Jon Stewart has a lame conversation with Sarah Jessica Parker


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Jennifer Aniston: "I might as well pull my pants down at this point, since they've seen everything else."


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Naked in Public
  • Play the "free video preview" and listen to the old lady's classical British under-reaction.


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JibJab has posted their latest vid: Bush's year-end round-up


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Star Wars in 30 seconds with bunnies (Now with deleted scenes!)


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"King Kong Bombing Big Time at Box Office"
  • "Peter Jackson's 'King Kong' - a three-hour, $300 million extravaganza that wowed advance screening audiences - is a catastrophe in the making."


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A New York woman threw her one-month-old son from the third floor of a burning building and the baby was caught by an amateur baseball player standing outside


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"For the third time in four years, singer Britney Spears is No. 1 -- as far as Internet users are concerned.
  • Spears topped Yahoo's annual list of the most-searched for names on the Internet.


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Letterman's "Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear At Your Office Christmas Party"


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Teri Hatcher won substantial libel damages on Friday from a British newspaper that alleged she used a camper van outside her home to have sex with a series of men.
  • The Sport's lawyer David Hirst said the paper was sorry for the article "which they fully accept was entirely false."



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BBC - The life of Charles Dickens (animation)


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The Nigerian Santa Scam


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Bad Santa's Favorite Evil Toys


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Top Ten Villainous Moments in Comics


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Stern Goes Out in (His) Style


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Stephen Colbert and Congressman Major Owens swap rap poems.


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Some things Stephen Colbert is looking forward to in the coming year.


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Daily Show Headlines - Iraq: The Vote
  • It seems like Election Day is the only time things don't blow up in Iraq.


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"Until Hell Freezes Dover"
  • The Daily Show's Samantha Bee investigates a wretched town that was an idyllic paradise until they voted God out.


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"THE SEVEN NOT-SO-DEADLY SINS"
  • PHONINESS -- Putting on a bogus British accent when you merely vacationed in England for two weeks angers the Lord.
  • IGNORANCE -- "It really irks God when someone prays to Him using poor grammar," the Bible scholar says.


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The domestic and international trailers for Freedomland
  • "Based on Richard Price's bestselling novel, which opens as a bruised and bloodied white woman named Brenda Martin stumbles into a Dempsey, New Jersey, emergency room, claiming that a black man stole her car with her four-year-old son in the backseat. Veteran detective Lorenzo Council is assigned to investigate the case, and despite reservations about Brenda's story, he launches an all-out search for the abducted boy. Jesse Haus, an ambitious young reporter for the local newspaper, also suspects that Brenda is hiding something, and she befriends the grief-stricken mother in an attempt to break the biggest story of her career. But as the search for the alleged carjacker intensifies, smoldering racial tensions between the predominantly black city of Dempsey and its mostly white neighbor, Gannon, threaten to explode."


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'Desperate Housewives' will be shown in China starting on Monday", where it will be known as "ambitious, yet subservient housewives."


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VIDEO: Voted Best Beer Commercial of 2005
  • You have to be patient. It stars out pedestrian, but the last few seconds save the day. Sorta


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Looking back from 2105 - the Christmas gadgets of the past century


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Yakov Smirnov joke of the day - in Soviet Russia, the monkey spanks you. (Warning: Really, REALLY, not safe for work. Any work. Not even if you work in the Japanese Octopus Porn industry.)


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Conan does his own analysis of King Kong


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A full 5 Minute Clip from Casanova


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The trailer from American Dreamz
  • Bizarre premise for a comedy, but I did laugh a few times during the trailer!
  • Filmmaker Paul Weitz-whose comic explorations have ventured into the synergistic halls of corporate culture ("In Good Company"), the perils of psychological isolationism ("About a Boy") and the vicissitudes of losing one's virginity ("American Pie")-now delivers a comedy yanked from right-now popular culture...where the nation's shrinking attention span is more focused on "what's hot" than on hot-button headlines: American Dreams.

    On the morning of his re-election, the President (Quaid) decides to read the newspaper for the first time in four years. This starts him down a slippery slope. He begins reading obsessively, reexamining his black and white view of the world, holing up in his bedroom in his pajamas. Frightened by the President's apparent nervous breakdown, his Chief of Staff (Dafoe) pushes him back into the spotlight, booking him as a guest judge on the television ratings juggernaut (and the President's personal fave), the weekly talent show American Dreamz.

    America can't seem to get enough of American Dreamz, hosted by self-aggrandizing, self-loathing Martin Tweed (Grant), ever on the lookout for the next insta-celebrity. His latest crop of hopefuls includes Sally (Moore), a conniving steel magnolia with a devoted, dopey veteran boyfriend (Klein), and Omer, a recent Southern Californian immigrant (who just happens to be a bumbling, show tune singing, would-be terrorist awaiting activation). When both Sally and Omer make it to the final round of Dreamz-where the President will be judging along with Tweed-the stage is set for a show the nation will never forget.



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"the biggest decline in movie attendance in 20 years."


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