Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Get $115? Spend the weekend with David Lynch and a Quantum Physicist in Fairfield, Iowa
  • Do you think that genius scientist understands Eraserhead?


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The Motley Fool calls CBS's Stern lawsuit "brutally idiotic" (He's analyzing it as a financial strategy, not as a legal move.) Geez, Motley, you have to stop holding back and being so subtle.


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Three more clips for 16 Blocks (Opens Friday)


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Video - Tyra Banks undercover as a stripper


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Here's a video clip of Lohan falling out of her dress.


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Presidential Nicknames: The Complete List on "White House For Kids" (WHITEHOUSE.ORG)
  • Bono
    Musician/Activist = "Boner McFaggy-Shades"


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Borowitz: "BUSH PAYS SURPRISE VISIT TO REALITY" ... President Calls Two-Hour Stop in Real World "Informative"


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Scott Stapp thinks a recently released sex video showing him and Kid Rock with several strippers is meant to sabotage him.
  • "Obviously someone wants to hurt me and doesn't want me to be successful in my solo career"


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Teri Hatcher admits using botox and collagen, says "no mas"


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Colbert reports on Mardi Gras
  • "Through the sheer power of alcohol and bare breasts, the Deep South has risen again."


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Liberty University's debate coach debates with Stephen about debating.


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Colbert: Tip o' the Hat; Wag o' the Finger


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Colbert asks, "Who's attacking me now?"


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business and military acronyms and abbreviations dictionary
  • This is not a satire site, but is surprisingly unsafe for work, even though it uses "chick" as an euphemism when the "C" should stand for "cunt." Some of the naughty military acronyms, like FUBAR, have crept into civilian life without people really thinking about what the "F" stands for.


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Rack and Ruin - The Supreme Court considers Anna Nicole's surprisingly real claims.


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More of Lohan with her boob hanging out.


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Lindsay Lohan with her entire boob hanging out


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"God Tells Antwaan Randle El To Sign With CFL Just To See If He'll Do It" ... Oh, that God. He thinks just because his tests worked on Abraham they'll work on anyone.


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A bid to have the 2014 Winter Olympics on the icy planet Hoth


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Noted Individuals Who Have Experienced Homelessness
  • James Bond used to live on a park bench? He likes his benches "lacquered, not painted"
  • Of course, he was the only homeless guy with a valet.
  • "Golf, Goldfinger? Certainly. I think I have an old Titleist somewhere in my shopping cart."


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"Bloody Thursday" looms over NFL
  • This article is about the scramble to meet the salary caps.
  • "This year? People are going to be stunned -- not just by the quantity of players who are cut by Thursday but by the quality, too. It's going to be ugly. There's going to be blood in the streets and, compared to past years, it's going to be from some bluebloods, guys who can still play."


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Fans mourning the recent loss of two iconic television actors will be heartened to learn that a previously 'lost' television episode featuring the two has been discovered.
  • In the episode, McGavin's character Carl Kolchak is sent to Mayberry, North Carolina, to do a human-interest piece on drunk-turned-lottery-winner Otis "The Drunk" Campbell. Shortly after his arrival, Aunt Bee is turned into a hideous Bee-ast by contaminated feminine hygiene products and starts slaughtering the hapless residents of bucolic Mayberry. It is up to Kolchak, with the help of Deputy Barney Fife, to take on the Bee-ast.


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Where are they now ...?? The Official head shot for Frank Sinatra Junior


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Jessica Alba Threatens Playboy Over Cover Pic
  • "Actress Jessica Alba, who appears in a bikini on the cover of Playboy's March issue, is threatening to sue the magazine, claiming that Hugh Hefner & Co. are trying to make it seem that she appears in a 'nude or semi-nude pictorial.' In a February 23 legal threat letter, a copy of which you'll find below, Alba's lawyer demands that Playboy cease distributing the magazine and provide the 25-year-old actress with a 'monetary settlement' for its unauthorized use of her image for commercial purposes."


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Bush Gets Oprah To Endorse Seaport Deal
  • "Oprah's endorsement will provide the President with more time to locate his lost veto stamp thingy."


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California to ban opposite sex marriages


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Coming Soon has three clips from Ultraviolet


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The domestic trailer for Lucky Number Slevin


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The poster for "lucky number slevin"!


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A new novel for baseball fans: A Man Called Shoeless


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Belgians take their Coke bottles to Netherlands to collect the deposit.
  • It's fairly substantial - thirty cents per bottle


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Minnesota Senator apologizes for saying the Mayo Clinic is worth more than the entire State of South Dakota, even though it is, of course, true.
  • At least the apology was easy. He just had to stroll across the aisle. South Dakota only has two citizens, so they're both in the Senate.


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Anti-Darwin Bill Defeated Overwhelmingly in Utah


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China announces the creation of an alternate internet.


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