Friday, August 25, 2006

It's August 25th ... and you're on notice!



Today's notes:


  • That mathematical genius guy proved the Poincare Conjecture by imagining pudding in an infinite number of containers in an infinite number of shapes, all capable of becoming spheres. Once again, the proof is in the pudding.
  • Bear dicks are shrinking? Aren't they ornery enough already?
  • New Testament PJs. I'm just not going to give up my Old Testament PJs. Dude, some things are just classics.
  • Walt Disney's staff decided today that Pluto is no longer a dog, because of the new definition requiring cartoon dogs to talk and to be taller than cartoon mice. Goofy is still a dog, but Pluto has been reduced to the status of dwarf dog.


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THE 20TH CENTURY'S WORST CRIME GOES UNPUNISHED (and largely unremembered)


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Mike Judge's IDIOCRACY finally to be released on September 1st - in a whopping 7 cities!!
  • I may check this out. Austin is one of the seven


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eBay: Barnett Rhino Recurve Crossbow. Seller must dispose in order to pay for Kung-Fu lessons. (You have to read the outrageous write-up.)


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The "Improv Everywhere" group pranks Home Depot


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Automobile steering wheels carry more than twice as many germs as a toilet seat
  • Dave Barry's simple solution: steer your car with a toilet seat


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SURVIVOR HIRES EUGENECIST TO RACIALLY CATEGORIZE CAST


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The Trailer from The Queen
  • Helen Mirren plays QE2 in this film about the struggle between the queen and Tony Blair about the proper way to handle the Diana funeral


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Did Bob Dylan steal (or buy) the song 'Blowin' in the Wind' from a New Jersey high school student?"
  • As ludicrous as this sounds, it was a persistent rumor in the early 60s. Snopes has the entire story.


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Colbert discusses Osama's love-tips


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Stephen Colbert in defense of Bush's love of fart jokes


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Colbert hates National Peach Month because of the undue credit given to Georgia


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"Daily Show: Rocky Trailer Picture Show"
  • A Hurricane Katrina victim proves to be the anti-Cindy Sheehan.


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Best Asian game show ever


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An interesting interview. Jon Stewart talks to an expert in The Decency Wars ... (Part 1, Part 2)


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Odd stuff: CHICKENHEAD COMIC STRIP


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Heather Locklear wears a see-through skirt


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Citizens spot cow flying over Madrid


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It's a blessed day for science. You no longer have to wang your welly manually.
  • I dunno. I've been wanging the welly manually for five decades now, so I guess I'll keep it up until I go blind.


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Paris Hilton caught hacking into Lindsay Lohan's answering service account
  • The pentagon can feel Lindsay's pain. Paris keeps hacking into their mainframe and jacking with it. That little scamp!


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6-year-old traumatized to discover male animals have penises!


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Still the city of the big shoulders? Some Chicagoans are not pussies! Unfortunately, none of them play for the Cubs.


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A new clip from Crank, Jason Statham's latest actioner


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Will it be NBC's latest TV show concept? Pimp My Cat


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Porn on the Swedish news
  • It's one of those news sets where the newsreader has multiple monitors behind him. Some wag ran a Czech porn film on one of them.


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Make your own Jackson Pollock painting in seconds


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Your 2006 NFL Drinking and Drugging Season Preview


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The 50 worst hairstyles of all time


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The 10 Coolest Real Robots


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The 10 Greatest Robberies of all time


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Austin teacher resigns over nude photos


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'Hitler' restaurant to change name
  • "Puneet Sablok said he would remove Hitler's name and the Nazi swastika from billboards and the menu."
  • The old name: Hitler's Cross (represented by a swastika). The new name: Bludgeoned Baby Seals


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The top ten stupidest As Seen on TV products


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"THIS PICTURE WAS TAKEN WHEN NIAGARA FALLS WAS COMPLETELY FROZEN IN THE YEAR 1911"


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Actor Tom Cruise has a new award to add to his collection -- "most sexist celebrity"


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1971 McDonalds commercial with Willard Scott as Ronald



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Sequel announced to 28 Days Later.


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College Football Fans Tab Ohio State as Pre-Season No. 1 in Inaugural Poll


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"Evolutionary biology has vanished from the list of acceptable fields of study for recipients of a federal education grant for low-income college students."


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