Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Eminem claims to have slept with Tara Reid, Britney Spears, Mariah Carey


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Aussie filmmaker says: "It is much worse in Miami than it is in Baghdad" Yeah, but the coffee is better in Miami.


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New Royal Mail stamp shows Santa shitting down a chimney


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To balance off our usual "criminal mastermind" stories, here's a "police mastermind" report: Police accept check as bail from accused check forger ... you know the rest


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CBS calls it: Democrats Take The House


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The thirteen enemies of the internet
  • The big three, of course, are Cuba, North Korea and Turkmenistan (which has a leader very similar to North Korea's)


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Australian criminology experts conclude that piracy calculations are ... well, to cut through the spin and legalese ... "utter bullshit"
  • Copyright owners use street-value estimates to calculate losses, but this assumes that every person who bought pirated goods would otherwise have paid for a legitimate item, and that none of them did buy a legal copy after previewing the pirated one!


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CNN projects that the GOP has lost Chafee's Rhode Island seat in the Senate. ... Net score to date: GOP -3, Dems +2, Indy +1


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Election watchers, here's:CNN's Elections 2006. As of 9:00 Eastern time, Democrats have picked up two Senate seats from Republicans, but have lost one to Joe Liebermann moving from Democrat to independent.
  • CNN projects that Rick Santorum has lost his seat in the Senate. He is losing by a decisive margin, a possible landslide. (2-1 as I type this)
  • George "Macaca" Allen's race is still too close to call. The candidates are only 7500 votes apart, with 69% of the votes tabulated
  • CNN projects that Mike DeWine has lost his seat in Ohio
  • CNN projects Liebermann as the winner, even though he's losing with 4% of the votes counted. Oh, those computers!


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My personal favorite headline of the day: "Election Results Won't Cut 'Dancing With Stars' Short"


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The Colbert Nation - Currently On-Notice or Dead to Me


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The Deep Sea's luminescent animals


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Florida Announces Precise Election Results Before Polls Open ... Gov. Bush Praises Efficiency of Electronic Voting Machines


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President Bush hails "a milestone in efforts to replace the rule of a tyrant with the rule of law"
  • I think he was referring to the 2008 elections.


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Want to work for Interview magazine? Just pass this pop culture quiz.


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Dirty Dancing being remade with Mario Lopez?


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Cameron Diaz: W Feature Story on Style.com
  • Cam has about the same vocab as Samuel L


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Faith Hill Getting Owned at the CMA's (A joke? For real? I have based my life on the teachings of Dalton, and he would say, "Opinions vary.")


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The HD trailer for The Reaping
  • "Hilary Swank plays a former Christian missionary who lost her faith after her family was tragically killed, and has since become a world renowned expert in disproving religious phenomena. But when she investigates a small Louisiana town that is suffering from what appear to be the Biblical plagues, she realizes that science cannot explain it."
  • Wow. Science cannot explain fictional stuff? Whoda thunk it?


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The trailer for Rocky Balboa


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The HD trailer for Norbit, Eddie Murphy's latest.
  • "Norbit has never had it easy. As a baby, he was abandoned on the steps of a Chinese restaurant/orphanage and raised by Mr. Wong. Things get worse when he’s forced into marriage by the mean, junk food-chugging queen, Rasputia. Just when Norbit’s hanging by his last thread, his childhood sweetheart, Kate, moves back to town. Norbit has never had it easy. As a baby, he was abandoned on the steps of a Chinese restaurant/orphanage and raised by Mr. Wong. Things get worse when he’s forced into marriage by the mean, junk food-chugging queen, Rasputia. Just when Norbit’s hanging by his last thread, his childhood sweetheart, Kate, moves back to town. "


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Britney's actual petition of divorce against K-Fed (.pdf format)


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The trailer and official website for The Painted Veil
  • "Based on the novel by W. Somerset Maugham, The Painted Veil is a love story set in the 1920s that tells the story of a young English couple, Walter (Edward Norton), a middle class doctor and Kitty (Naomi Watts), an upper-class woman, who get married for the wrong reasons and relocate to Shanghai, where she falls in love with someone else. When he uncovers her infidelity, in an act of vengeance, he accepts a job in a remote village in China ravaged by a deadly epidemic, and takes her along. Their journey brings meaning to their relationship and gives them purpose in one of the most remote and beautiful places on earth."


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Headline of the month for March: "Colon family in exploding toilet ordeal"
  • I think they should have seen that coming. Especially after they named their son Spástico.


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Dr. Frankenstein has been elected president of the California Medical Association


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The trailer, two clips, and a TV spot for Bobby
  • "Bobby," written and directed by Emilio Estevez, revisits the night Robert F. Kennedy was gunned down at the Ambassador Hotel in 1968. With an incredible ensemble cast portraying fictionalized characters from a cross-section of America, the film follows 22 individuals who are all at the hotel for different purposes but share the common thread of anticipating Kennedy's arrival at the primary election night party, which would change their lives forever. This historic night is set against the backdrop of the cultural issues gripping the country at the time, including racism, sexual inequality and class differences.


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The trailer for The Aura
  • Espinoza is a shy taxidermist who secretly dreams of executing the perfect robbery. On his first ever hunting trip, in the calm of the Patagonian forest, his dreams are made reality with one squeeze of the trigger. Espinoza accidentally kills a man who turns out to be a real criminal and inherits his scheme: the heist of an armored van carrying casino profits. Caught up in a world of complex new rules and frightening violence, Espinoza's lack of experience puts him in real danger. And he has another, more dangerous liability: he is an epileptic. Before each seizure he is visited by the "aura": a paradoxical moment of confusion and enlightenment where the past and future seem to blend. These attacks appear without notice when he least expects them, just when he needs all his wits about him ...


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The international trailer for Catch and Release, a new comedy/drama starring Jennifer Garner.
  • Garner will play a woman facing the sudden death of her husband and the secrets he kept from her. Whoa - that sounds like some wacky-ass shit! If ever there was a great comedy premise, this is it


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Daily Box Office for Monday, November 6, 2006
  • Borat is still picking up steam. On Monday it took in more than the next three films added together.. amd took in an unheard of $4000 per screen. In comparison, the second best film took in $348 per screen.


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This comedy looks like it might have some potential: The trailer for Reno 911: Miami
  • "Reno 911!: Miami" finds the Comedy Central officers visiting a national police convention in Miami Beach at the height of spring break. When the convention center is bio-attacked, it's up to Reno's "finest" to save the day."


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bettybeauty, the first safe pubic dye.


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Create your own Jackson Pollock masterpiece (left-click mouse to change colors)


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"This is the Knuckle Tattoo Project. Collecting pictures of knuckle tattoos." (as you might expect from the name)


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Anagramsite.com - a list of wacky anagrams, or a tool to create your own


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What do songs really mean?


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Britney Spears Files for Divorce


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This paid political advertisement provided by the Alcohol-Marijuana Equalization Initiative Committee, SAFER Colorado, shows Vice President Dick Cheney.


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GALLUP: Key Indicators Favor Democrats in Midterm Elections.
  • "In fact, no president has had a lower approval rating at the time of a midterm election since 1950."
  • " ... the latest 26% approval rating for Congress ranks among the worst Gallup has recorded in a midterm election since 1974."


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The Jewish commuinity is split on whether Borat's anti-Semitism is good for them.


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Get Oslo on the phone! Finnish mathematician claims to have penned hardest sudoku


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Tyra Banks uses her closing segment to go batshit crazy over vaseline. (I take it she's spoofing Oprah.)


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Colbert's Report for Monday, November 6


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The Daily Show for Monday, November 6:


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