Sunday, December 03, 2006

Today saluting an "Other Crappy" legend - Pete Doherty - "The Duke of Dorchester"


Pete was the Ray Oyler of wrestling. You'll note in his profile that he didn't have a finishing move, or even a favorite move. I guess they didn't count "lying on his back" as a move. If I remember right, he lost every match he was ever in - over a period of several years - until his farewell appearance in Boston, where his home town crowd went crazy when he beat Lanny Poffo, The Macho Man's less macho brother.


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X-Rated X-Mas "Pornaments" Raise Eyebrows, Penises
It is just sad they have to stoop to this kind of thing to defame Christmas


  • I agree. I think "they" need to defame Christmas with the other kinds of things! Sometimes the old ways are the best.
  • By the way, the story is also accompanied by a video


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Twilight Zone - Valley of the Shadow

  • A reporter finds himself trapped in a small town where people can reverse time and ...


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BCS picks Gators to meet Ohio State for the National Crown

  • I sure called that one wrong. Michigan was edged out in the system by a hundredth of a point.
  • How close was it? Florida and Michigan were exactly tied in the computer portion of the rankings.


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High court takes 'Bong Hits for Jesus' case
  • The case against free speech will be argued by none other than the infamous Ken Starr, who's now a university dean. Starr urged the high court in his appeal brief to clear up the "doctrinal fog infecting student speech jurisprudence."
  • Translated into English, that means: "As long as students have the right to express honest opinions, they will continue to remind me and the rest of the world that I suck."


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Italian Mafia takes the cheese
Italian cheese companies are scrambling for a way to deal with the sudden increase in criminal gangs' hijackings of shipments of their dairy products.

  • New Mafia strongmen include the warring dons, Don Parmesano and Don Romano, and the peace-making American Don Ricearoni, who's known as the San Francisco treatymaker.


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Brash Young Floor Trader Trying To Rally Dow All By Self

Hey, Johnson & Johnson, put a little heart into it!


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Crichton says Space Aliens Cause Global Warming
My topic today sounds humorous but unfortunately I am serious. I am going to argue that extraterrestrials lie behind global warming. Or to speak more precisely, I will argue that a belief in extraterrestrials has paved the way, in a progression of steps, to a belief in global warming. Charting this progression of belief will be my task today.


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Titans stun the mighty Colts
  • Vince Young hasn't had a great rookie year, but any time you beat the Colts, you've got something to remember. Peyton accumulated an incredible 12.5 yards per attempt, but two picks spoiled his day, and the Titan's Bironas sealed the victory by kicking a game-winning field goal from the suburbs to win it at the buzzer.


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Harry Potter 5 Behind-the-Scenes Clips!

  • Pretty handy! Coming Soon collected all 13 of the clips from Harry Potter Weekend, and placed them all on one page with convenient You Tube players.


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"Reggie Bush scores all four Saints TDs in victory over 49ers"

San Francisco quarterback Alex Smith was Bush's high school quarterback in San Diego. They won a pair of championships together. Their high school coach also was at the game.


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Swedes guard Christmas goat from vandals.
  • Long story. You see, before there was Father Christmas, the Swedes used to get their X-mas presents from a goat. The Swedes commemorate this with an annual tradition in which they build a 43-foot-high straw goat in Stockholm. Of course, this is a target for vandals and pranksters, who have figured out a way to burn it 22 times in 40 years. This year, the crafty Swedish officials have built it from flame-retardant straw.
  • I know it sounds like I'm kidding, but every word of that is true. If I had been kidding the public officials would have given up, and changed the tradition to build a giant marshmallow goat, for a tasty post-arson treat.


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The new James Blond has some revolutionary ideas for the 007 series.
  • He wants to whip out his willie on camera. What's more, he wants to do it for a gay love scene.
  • I have the script all ready to go. It's a remake of Goldfinger. The G-man can paint Bond's pecker gold on camera! After he buggers him of course. With a laser attached to his dick. "Do you expect me to come?" "I expect you to die, Mr Bond. Of pleasure!"
  • Will Brad Pitt and other superhunks compete to be the first Bond boy?


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Weekend Box Office Results for December 1–3, 2006.
  • It was another crop of weak new releases, and the weekend after Thanksgiving Weekend is always a poor one anyway, so the numbers are pretty sluggish.
  • The discrepancy between the predictions and the results may indicate that the predictions were a tad optimistic. Despite the poor results you see below, the week was actually 7% better than the comparable week last year, and that's actually a slight improvement over the recent trend.
  • Van Wilder 2 not only tanked at the box office, but it still standing at 0% positive reviews. It is a very strong candidate for the dishonor of being the worst theatrical film of the year.





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The Season's Top Toys


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Could you pass the U.S. citizenship test?


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The mime with Tourette's syndrome!


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"The last known cockfighting school in the United States is hanging up its spurs."


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