Friday, March 23, 2007

Late Night Political Jokes o' the Day
"Sources at the Pentagon say that several factories in Iraq will soon begin making clothes to be sold in the United States. Yeah, because Americans only want two things from Iraq -- a stable, central government and affordable, quality menswear"

"Al Gore returned to Congress yesterday. Everyone said Al Gore was treated like a rock star. Did you see him? I think the rock star was Meat Loaf."


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Kobe scores 50 for the 4th straight Laker win
Since he scored exactly 50, he had to go 16 for 16 from the stripe to keep the streak alive. Yesterday he was in the club of four. Now the club is just Kobe and Wilt.


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Everything You Wanted To Know About "Kim Kardashian, Superstar" But Were Afraid To Watch, from Fleshbot
I agree completely with this analysis. Kim K has to be the only sex tape with no female nudity. That's an exaggeration, but not by much. No breasts at all, only tease shots of butt, and ever-so-quick flashes of crotch, soon covered by a hand or head. The sex scenes are mostly spoon style, Ray J on top, with the camera at Kim's shoulder. The oral scenes feature a fully-clothed Kim sucking Ray J's big schwantz. The only thing good about it is that Kim actually seems to enjoy what she is doing.

It's a great sex tape if you want to look at dick. Otherwise, take a pass.


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Slideshow: things you don't see every day
Some truly great photos, but too small


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Toys that should not exist


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Things Other People Accomplished When They Were Your Age
Age 5: Mozart began composing minuets. Once when a second violinist failed to appear for a string quartet performance, Mozart took his place, even though he'd never seen the music.


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Witty Comics - make your own comic strip


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Some kick-ass leg-wobbling pictures of the skywalk over the Grand Canyon


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URL says it all: GodTube.com


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"Man gets pizza tattooed on head"


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Headline of the day: "Albania clamps down on school of lust"
School of Lust? Wasn't that a famous comedy during the English Restoration? Either that or Ron Jeremy's adult spin-off from a Jack Black film.

"The Education Ministry sacked two male teachers, replaced the headmaster and put a female teacher on probation after incensed parents in Xhyre, near the Macedonia border, locked the schoolhouse to stop the drinking and fornication in class."


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"A single Chinese man is advertising on the internet for a female tomb-mate so he won't be alone after death."


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Sarah Silverman kicks off the 2007 Film Independent Spirit Awards, explaining how they are different from the Adult Film awards.


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British profs conclude that alcohol and tobacco are worse than pot and ecstasy


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Mel Goes all Mad Max on some college dorks


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Winslet and DeCaprio to reunite for a drama.
"It revolves around a suburban 1950s couple tragically caught between their true desires and the pressure to conform."


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Who killed JFK? The Last Confessions of E. Howard Hunt
Rolling Stone article about Hunt and his son. Fascinating reading, if totally sensationalized.

"They sure don't make White House bad guys the way they used to. Today you've got flabby-faced half-men like Karl Rove, with weakling names like 'Scooter,' blandly hacking their way through the constraints of the U.S. Constitution, while back then, in addition to Hunt, you had out-and-out thugs like G. Gordon Liddy, his Watergate co-conspirator and Nixon's dirty-tricks chief, who would hold his own hand over an open flame to prove what a real tough guy he was. It all seems a little nutty now, but in 1972 it was serious business."

Very true. There were giants in those days; guys intoxicated with spying and their own power to affect world events. Hunt was one of the most intriguing, and there are no more stories like his in today's world. Valerie Plame? Yawn. Hunt was the real deal when it came to espionage and intrigue. He snuck around Latin America in disguise and overthrew governments. Six months after the Watergate break-in, Hunt's wife died in a plane crash with $10,000 cash in her purse.

While Matt Damon's role in The Good Shepherd was based more closely on James Jesus Angleton, it could just as easily have been Hunt with only the most minor changes. Hunt graduated from Brown in 1940, Angleton from Yale in 1941. Angleton went from WW2 military service to OSS to CIA. Hunt did the same, except through the navy. Angleton once started a poetry review. Hunt wrote romantic spy novels. Self-styled Renaissance men, they were truly cut from the same cloth.

Anyway, the bottom line of the story is that LBJ ordered the JFK assassination. I have never seriously advocated this theory, but I've joked about it many times. When you get right down to it, it is the only explanation that makes any sense because of the motive angle. If you consider the motivations of anyone else who has ever been implicated, you end up conceding that they really had nothing to gain from Kennedy's death. But one person had everything to gain.


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"Under Bush's plan, White House aides such as Karl Rove and Harriet Miers would testify under the infamous "Cone of Silence" employed in the iconic 1960's spy show, Get Smart."
"Just to ensure that no public leaks of testimony occur, Bush added that 'only Republicans will be allowed into the Cone of Silence, with the exception, of course, of Joe Lieberman.'"


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ESPN.com - Men's College Basketball - NCAA Tournament Scoreboard
Three of the four games were nail-biters, but the favorites won all four, so the only teams to advance were #1 and #2 seeds. A&M should have taken Memphis, but just ran out of steam and scored only 22 in the second half, then lost on some last minute free throws. Tough way to go out, but as the highlander dudes say, there can be only one.


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The first 100 Londoners to buy a PS3 got quite a surprise ...
... a free 46" HDTV to play it on! The poor 101st guy got The Best of Mr Bean DVD


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Hamburglar attempts to rob a local McDonalds to get his burger fix. Filmed 'guerilla style' with hidden cameras.


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Best-Selling Author Terry McMillan Sues Her "Little Fag" Ex
... calling him a "common fucking criminal...extortionist."

Their courtship is the basis of the novel and screenplay "How Stella Got Her Groove Back."

It seems that her groove is again in remission.


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Kobe scores 60 more
He is only the fourth player in history to score 50 or more in three consecutive games. You may have heard of the other three guys: Michael Jordan, Wilt Chamberlain, and Elgin Baylor. It's been 20 years since Jordan did it, and he's the only other guy to do it since 1962!


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HOLLYWOOD TV ADAPTATION SHORTAGE EXPECTED SOON!


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Angelina Jolie And 'People': Who Adopted Whom?
"Competitors in the industry have long been steamed at what they perceive as People's seemingly unfettered access to Jolie, her children, and Brad Pitt, and the magazine's role in turning Jolie into some sort of vainglorious, self-righteous and yet extremely hot version of Mother Theresa."


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