Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Could Superman be any bigger a pussy than in that Superman Returns as Jesus movie?
Absolutely! Click the link to see how.


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Fire destroys longtime Johnny Cash home
and it burns, burns, burns ...


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Pop Culture Palace is updated with somgs numbers 19-16 of 1963
This group marks the first appearance of Bob Dylan, the Beatles and the Rolling Stones on the Pop Culture scene


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ROTTEN TOMATOES: Opening Movies. Early Look
Incredibly crowded field this week
  • Hoax: Richard Gere as Clifford Irving - expanding - 84% positive reviews
  • Disturbia: PG-13 thriller with Shia LeBeouf - 2500 theaters - 69% positive
  • Perfect Stranger: Balkimania! (Just kidding. R-rated thriller with Halle Berry and Bruce Willis.) - 2500 theaters - not reviewed
  • Redline: PG-13 indie gearhead movie- 2000 theaters - not reviewed
  • Pathfinder - R-rated fantasy story about the Vikings in North America - 1700 theaters - not reviewed
  • Slow Burn: R-rated thriller with Ray Liotta - 1100 theaters - not reviewed
  • Aqua Teen: R-rated stoner movie - 800 theaters - 67% positive reviews, but two reviewers said it was an unbearably bad movie, which is a bad sign. An even worse sign is that the Village Voice liked it!!


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Hilarious review of Aqua Teen Hunger Force
" ... if George W Bush could prove that Saddam Hussein had funded this movie I would reverse my stance on the Iraq War and say that every single civilian casualty was justified."


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The Weekend Warrior's analysis of the upcoming weekend
Faced with competition from six new wide releases, Grindhouse is expected to disappear from the top five. If it falls more than the standard 48%, it could drop completely out of the top ten!

The battle for #1 this week will be between two new films and Blades of Glory. One of the new films is an R-rated thriller starring Halle Berry and Bruce Willis. The other is a PG-13 thriller starring Shia LeBeouf.


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Fantasy Moguls EARLY WEEKEND PREVIEW: LaBeouf vs. Berry - 'Disturbia' and 'Stranger' Neck-and-Neck in Tracking


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Very cool stuff: Superconducting Magnetic Levitation Model Train


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from: New York, New York ... to: Paris, France ... (Google Maps)
Check out step 23


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A 40-part series is being made by Chinese state television about the life of Bruce Lee


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Is Sly Stone planning a comeback
He recently played a live show in Vegas after, oh, about 35 years out of the limelight


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URL says it all: Celebrities-Eating.com


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Sexiest Body Divides at the Sexes
"Several 2007 lists of the world's sexiest women have come out. Today Scarlett Johansson was declared #1 by Glamour's female voters, but in two recent men's magazine polls (Ask Men and Stuff), Scarlett came in second to Beyonce and Jessica Biel. Ya know why? Cuz men love butts!

My own observations have led me to conclude that men love tits even more than butts, but it does seem the male taste is moving toward ever-bigger butts.


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IMUS QUITS RADIO PROGRAM TO BECOME RAPPER 'VANILLA WRINKLES'


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Coming soon? A sex tape from the diaper astronaut?
"A police search of former astronaut Lisa Nowak's car turned up bondage photos on a computer disk, British currency and pills, according to documents released Tuesday by prosecutors."


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Five Reasons George W. Bush Isn't As Stupid As You Think
"The President has contributed more new words to the English language than anyone since Shakespeare. How many words did, say, Jimmy Carter invent? Zero (although the sharp rise in popularity of the phrase 'what a pussy' coincided exactly with his presidency)."


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Russian alcohol consumption has tripled since 1990
And they were no slouches to begin with!


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Grindhouse films to be split?
"The Weinstein Company may split each film up individually, just as they're going to do in Europe. But they're going to do it quickly, maybe even this weekend, right here in America."


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What an asshole!


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Giant Squid Appear Off California Coast
"They are deadly, huge and fast moving. Their tentacles can suck the life out of a human being"

Oh, the squid are not so bad. That quote only refers to the squids' agents.


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If Jesus comes back, He had better keep His loaves and fishes out of Orlando
They have a city "ordinance that bars feeding large groups of people in parks without a special permit."


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Top 10 Political Comedy Videos on YouTube


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Pacman gets to watch the intermission cartoon this year, must wait for the 2008 maze
Next step: "game over"


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Charges to be dropped against Duke lacrosse players.


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Peter O'Toole's condition upgraded to "zombie"


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Colbert gets into trouble for radio slurs - against Hungarians:


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The nanny culture of child-rearing
"An Australian study recently found that playground injuries continue to rise despite safety improvements. The safe new play structures are so boring that kids are taking more risks in order to have fun."


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DNA shows Tom Brady is the father of the Smith baby
It was really Larry Birkhead.


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Looking back on the raunchy youthploitation comedies of the early and middle eighties.
"What do you use for a jockstrap, kid? A peanut shell and a rubber band?" (Porky's)


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Durant will not be back for a sophomore year.
" ... it's largely expected that Durant will announce today that he'll leave Texas for the NBA."


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Court rules: "A judge violated a juvenile's free-speech rights when he placed her on probation for posting an expletive-laden entry on MySpace criticizing a school principal."


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"Did Hillary Clinton Really Attempt To Join The Marines in 1975?"
If that story were any more improbable and exaggerated, Frank Miller would be drawing a comic book about it.


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The Newbury College baseball program may need a little work
Last week they dropped a 57-1 squeaker to Bridgewater State. And it's a lot WORSE than it sounds because it was a seven inning game, and Bridgewater was the home team, so they never got to bat in the seventh. Therefore, Bridgewater scored 56 in six innings!

Newbury's starting pitcher never retired a single batter and left the game after facing seven batters and allowing seven earned runs! One of their relievers allowed 22 runs in two innings, then the next guy got things under control - allowing only 20 runs in his two innings!

Bridgewater's cleanup hitter went 7 for 8 with 10 RBI.


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Stern on Imus
"Howard Stern of Sirius Satellite Radio, no fan of Imus but a big fan of unrestricted content, yesterday mocked Imus' apology. 'He's apologizing like a guy who got his first broadcasting job,' said Stern. 'He should have said, 'Fuck you, it's a joke.'"

I never thought I'd agree with Howard Stern on a substantive issue. That's like a red flag that my opinion must be wrong. It's the same awful, ugly, lost feeling I get when I write a movie review that agrees with the Village Voice - I know I must be wrong, but I don't know why.


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Slap! Bad Imus! Ok, Now Everybody Back to Your Raunchy Radio.
I don't really care about this issue. Don Imus gets paid to offend everyone. It seems to me that it would be racist if he would single out black people for special treatment, and he would single them out by NOT offending them.

But having said that, I was struck by this quote "Two whole weeks, possibly without pay." So he might get paid for his two weeks off the air? In other words, his punishment is a paid vacation!! Man, that's harsh. There has to be something in the Constitution or maybe the Geneva Conventions to prevent such severe torture.

Then I got to thinking: "Y'know, the country really needs something to unify us." It seems to me this is the perfect chance to bring America together. The African-American lefties are calling for Imus to be punished more severely, and the right-wing nutburgers seem to agree, judging by O'Reilly and Malkin. How often do those groups agree? Given that, I suggest we go well beyond what anyone has asked for and give him the ultimate penalty - public execution. Idaho still allows the firing squad. I think this would be the perfect punishment. Line up Imus in front of some elite marksmen in Boise and have them unload about 5000 rounds into the guy on live television. Imus has lived a full life and, judging from his facial appearance, an extremely long one, possibly dating back to the mesozoic era. It's time to put him down like an old dog, and it seems to be something that all Americans, left and right, will enjoy as a cathartic public spectacle.

Plus, unlike most executed men, his last words should be amusing. Hell, you could even turn the event into a roast. Before the actual execution, a few people like Lisa Lampanelli and Triumph the Insult Dog and especially some black comics can do some riffs on Imus. Then Imus can have a chance to respond with some insults of his own before they blow him to bits. Hell, it's a great chance to make himself seem even more vile and offensive, thus making everyone enjoy the execution even more. Talk about great reality TV!


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Sony Report Reveals First Look at Absolute Blu-ray and HD DVD Disc Sales Figures
Except for a very few titles like Casino Royale, the sales numbers are vey low. This week, nine hundred units are good enoughf or eighth place!

Blu-Ray is starting to dominate the HD category. Of the top ten sellers for the week of March 18th, only one (The Departed) was HD-DVD, but that title was a dual issue, and retailers sold twice as many in the Blu-Ray format.

Besides the undecided format war, high retail prices are an additional source of consumer reluctance.


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10-foot cigarette missing in Pensacola
The strangest part of the story - nobody noticed, and the owner had to guess when it was taken!


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Dreamed up phone number leads man to a bride
"A British man has met and married a 22-year-old woman after, by his own account, dreaming of her phone number and then sending her a text message."


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GALLUP: McCain not quite dead yet, but will probably be thrown on the stretcher anyway.


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